Scary moments

We had a scary moment the other night. Kristen and Cody were sitting on the couch watching TV, when Kristen noticed something strange. Cody was sitting up, with his front paws seeming like he was trying to wipe his eyes. It became clear in a few seconds that he was not in control of his own body.

I was asleep. She scooped him up and hurried back to the bedroom with him, and woke me up. He was still out of control and clearly afraid and confused, tail covering hole. It was probably fortunate I was asleep, because I had a relatively easy time staying calm for some reason, although I know I've been thinking about him constantly for the past three days.

He was making almost a full round paddling motion with each of his front legs, and his neck seemed stuck to one side. We brought him to the couch, and sat with him, petting and reassuring him. His eyes were fixed on me, almost like he was asking for help. Gradually, the paddling legs stopped, and all that remained was his neck situation...gradually that loosened up too, and he started panting like he had run a marathon. His body was worn out. Then he laid down, and fell asleep.

Naturally Kristen called the emergency vet while I was looking up doggie seizures on the internet. They told us it was something that could be a fluke, as many dogs will have isolated seizures, and that dogs can even have one seizure a year and be fine. We called our vet the next morning and she said the same thing. That was Friday, today is Tuesday.

So that's the story. I don't think there's a way to adequately express the fear that we felt for our little schnauzer friend. He was so helpless, and there was nothing we could do to help him except tell him, stay calm, pet him, and reassure him.

But in that moment you start wondering if you're spending the last moments you ever will with him. I knew that other than trying to save him, it was important for him to know that we loved him, so I told him a lot as part of the reassurance. I hope he knows what it means when we tell him that we love him. He's a wonderful welcoming friend after a bad day, and a snuggly comforter when I'm tired. He's a calming presence under stress, and a joyful presence when I'm sad.

I hope he knows.

Thunder and Rain

Hi everyone, this is Cody.

I am a brave and fierce territory protecting dog. I am not afraid of any animal or person that walks in or in front of our house. I demand respect, and have no need to be afraid of anything. I can defeat any challenger.

There is however, one thing I am reasonably afraid of. And that is Dog. It is right to fear Dog, as Dog is the creator of all things, and although he is a just and merciful Dog, there are times where his wrath can be quite scary.

Such a time is when he growls very loudly and foams at the mouth until it overflows and pours out on all of us. Eddie and Kristen call this Thunder and Rain. They must believe in multiple dogs. Perhaps it is all the injustice facing my canine brothers and sisters across the world. There are starving canines in India and all over the world. Dog is very unhappy about this, and must remind us somehow.

Many days are bright and cheery, and for these days I thank Dog and like to go outside and sniff the air and feel his happy panting breath on my face. But on days of his wrath, I choose to stay inside. I shake with fear until it is over, until I know Dog is happy again. But we never know the day that Dog will come for us, and I don't understand why Kristen and Eddie aren't more afraid and shaking like I am. I try to warn them and try to make them understand...but even if they never do, I have to think that Dog will smile on them in the future for they are good to me. I wish they would remember to give me more hot meat and make sure I get to lick all the food off of the plates and counter instead of forgetting (humans have terrible memories!), but aside from that, they follow my schedule without complaining too much. I think Dog will have mercy on them. I believe he is a loving Dog, and will lick them in the face when we all meet with him in the heavenly Dog park.

Sorry to get all religious on you. But this is important stuff. Dog loves you.

Guilty Pleasures

Here are a list of guilty pleasures that I can pretty much be assured of always agreeing to eat. This is Eddie by the way. Cody is currently under all the covers in the bed. He hasn't been sleeping well, but he told me to say hello and he'll write again soon. I think he's been having some allergy issues lately, and that's kept him from resting.

Anyway, here are the top 5 relatively unhealthy guilty pleasures most often succumbed to under stress:

1. Chick-fil-a Number 5 (nuggets and waffle fries)
2. Macaroni Grill chocolate cake (omg...best cake ever)
3. Little Saigon Number 10 (Grilled pork, shrimp fried rice, eggrolls...SO good)
4. Fleur De Lis Italian sausage pizza.
5. Schlotszky's Fudge Chocolate Chip Cookies.
6. Hunan's chinese buffet
7. Baskin Robbins Chocolate Shake (SO bad for you. But delicious on a hot summer day)
8. Sushi.
9. Any seafood bisque.
10. Animal Crackers.

I just felt the need to share this. Out of all of those I would say the order in which I succumb the most is: 1, 10, 8, 6, 5, 3, 7, 4, 2, 9. To be honest, if I weren't concerned with living or dying, I'd throw number 2 right up there and eat it a lot more.

The Macaroni Grill spaghetti would have been on this list about 3 years ago, until I read a report where it was ranked the worst possible food you could buy at a chain restaurant. No kidding. THE worst on a top 10 list.

That is all.

The Middle

Hi everyone, it's Cody. Sorry we haven't written in a while.

Today I'd like to talk about the middle. The middle is a place where I belong. It's a place where I need to be. Wherever two or more are gathered, I should be in the middle. You may ask why. There are several reasons.

1. It allows me to protect all equally from the dogs and their humans that walk outside.

2. It allows all to hear my thunderous bark equally.

3. It assures me of maximum head, ear and back rubbing.

4. I am alerted to anyone's sudden movement.

5. It's warm.

This is why I have to be in the middle. I am very upset when I am not. It always confuses me when Eddie and Kristen are hugging and I get left out. I leap on them to remind them, because they just seem to be very forgetful.

Sometimes, a middle has to be made. This is done by forcing myself into the space where a middle would be. This is for the good of all.

If you ever come to visit, and you do not want me in the middle, there is only one thing for you to do. Deal with it.

Your friend, Cody.

Other Dogs

I am aware that I am a dog. I know I'm not a human. But I would say I have many human qualities, like observation.

Every morning when I take Eddie for a walk, I notice several dogs (and CATS!) along the way. I have named them all according to one thing or another.

When we first exit the house, we turn and walk a little. The first dog comes at the end of the block, and he is across the...what is it called...I think it's "street". Anyway, I know him as Hi, because when we pass, he barks once and that's it. He's just saying hi.

Then, when we get to the edge of the next block, that's when things get interesting. Across the "street" again is "Mad" a very small dog with a serious attitude, and he always brings his lady out with him, and he just piddles in front of their living place. Sometimes we see him, sometimes we don't. I try to pull Eddie over to see them, but I don't know that he's very smart or brave, because he just stays on a straight path and he's too heavy for me to pull where I want him to go.

Right after that is Crazy. I used to not understand "fences" until I met Crazy. It is a small white dog, and it broke out of its fence, and attacked me and Kristen (my other human) and then did it again to me and Eddie. I think that maybe she is just getting used to a new living place.

Then comes TWO CATS!! JUST TYPING ABOUT THEM MAKES ME EXCITED!! I WANT TO CHASE THEM!! I THINK CATS DESERVED TO BE CHASED, BECAUSE IF I DIDN'T CHASE THEM, WHAT WOULD THEY DO ALL DAY? SIT AROUND?

As we approach the edge of the next block, sometimes I see a dog that I think looks a lot like me, so I named him Twin. I see him walk past our house about 10 times a day. He must need to get his human a lot of exercise.

Then, as we turn again, there's Pretty. Pretty is a white dog, and I like her. I cry when I pass her because I want her to know I think she's pretty.

Then comes Doofus. Doofus is a big dog with a fence right next to the area we walk. Doofus always wants to show how tough he is, so he barks and runs along the fence and irritates me. It stresses me out, and I just lose my mind for a few seconds.

Right after Doofus on the next corner is Wow. A small very puffy dog. When it barks (as it does a lot) it sounds like "wow." Wow wow wow...wow wow wow...wow wow wow.

Then there's a dog named Dark who doesn't seem to need walking a human. He just walks around outside and poops and pees where he wants, and nobody picks it up. Eddie picks up my poop. I don't know why...is he saving it?

Then we come home. I hear some other dogs near us, so I just bark in the backyard when I hear them. It's nice to have neighbors.

Humiliation

Yesterday was not a good day. 

Normally, every day works like this. I get up and take Eddie for a walk, and then I come back and eat a little breakfast, climb up on the couch or under the bed and take a nap for about 4 hours.

Then, I wake up when Eddie comes home for lunch around noon, hang out with him for about an hour, then I go back to sleep for another 4-5 hours.

Eddie gets home at around 5, then Kristen, then I take one of them outside to watch me poop. This always results in me getting something called a "greenie", which I enjoy, even though I have no idea what's in it. Then they sit on the couches for a while to watch people talk, and eat their dinner, and sometimes I get some of their leftover food. Then I start grabbing toys and asking them to play.

Well, yesterday, Kristen's all "You get to come with me today!" So I get in the car and we go to this place with these really nice ladies who are all happy to see me. Normally when we go anywhere, I'm kind of just there to visit. Not yesterday. I go in, and I thought I was going somewhere else with Kristen. Well, I hear some other dogs in the back, and they're barking and whatever, and I'm realizing what's going on. I try to make a break for it when I realize that one of the other ladies has my leash and Kristen is heading out the door. I've been duped.

They proceed to bathe me and shave all my hair. I worked really hard to make my hair the way it is. I've rolled in a lot of grass lately, and I like the way I smell. Now I smell like a human. And I look ridiculous. 

You can see my displeasure. And they put a scarf on me. A scarf. On a dog. Dogs don't wear scarves. We wear our hair. That's it. Eddie came to pick me up, and I made sure to get out of there as quickly as I could. I peed in excitement on the first thing I could when I stepped outside.

I mean, it's not all bad. I'm a lot cooler when I sleep and I'm not panting as much. But it was a long day, and I was tired when it was over. 

On a different note, I pooped twice in a span of five minutes tonight. 

I Am the Dog

My name is Cody. I am a six year old schnauzer. I won't be fooled into thinking in terms of dog years, because that's sad.

I have two pretty good humans. They call each other sparky, sparkyhole, sparkaroni. It makes sense I guess, because they call me all sorts of things too that aren't my name.

I have a lot of questions about them though. They do things that don't make sense to me. I want to talk about one quickly. I can't type very fast yet, so I'll make it brief.

They fix variations of hot meat for their meals. I like hot meat. They eat most of it. There is some left usually.

I don't understand why I can't always have what's left. Sometimes I get it. Others I don't. I don't understand. There is no pattern. I live by routines and patterns.

Time to crawl under the bed. Gotta get up early for my walk.